Katherine S
Congratulations newly minted soccer player. Here are a few tips on how to become the best soccer player you can be:
- Skill. You do not need any skill for soccer, just go out there and so whatever. Pick flowers, trip over your feet, fall on your face, and mostly shoot the ball in your own goal.
- Positive attitude. Have a negative attitude always, it will get you so much farther than if you had a good one.
- Teamwork. Play selfishly. Don’t be a team player ever. Keep the ball to yourself. It makes your team happy with you and they will all be telling you good job.
- Team spirit. Have no team spirit at all. That is the best way to play, always be negative and tell everyone that they are doing bad.
- Defense. Don’t play defense at all. It is okay to let the other team take the ball away from you, better yet pick the ball up and hand it to them.
- Offense. Offense only wins games, it is really okay to not play the game at all. Your coach will surely keep you in the game.
- Stay hydrated. Don’t drink any water at all, your body will love this depletion of water. The vomit at the end of the game will for sure make all the parents and coaches enjoy you being on the team even more than they already do. I am sure the queasy moms will just want to take you home and love the puke.
- Think strong. When you shut your mind off it will be as if you are a vegetable. You will not perform bad at all, actually I am sure that you will have your best performance when you are brain dead.
- Stay strong. Who needs to be strong when you are just playing soccer? I mean it is just soccer. Right? Just let people push you around like it is nothing.
Encyclopedia of My Ordinary Life
Apples-
Apples are one of my most favorite fruit. They are healthy and delicious.
Brothers-
I have two brothers. Konnor and Kristopher. Konnor is eight and Kristopher is Nineteen.
Caramel-
Caramel is my favorite food. I do not think it is really a food but it is mine.
Dog-
My puppy is my baby. He is a min pin mix. He is almost two years old and he will never get any bigger than a puppy.
Evangelical-
Church has a major part in my life. Without religion in my life to keep me sane, my life would be even more crazy and hectic.
Fishing-
Fishing and I go hand-in-hand. I love fishing. When I catch a fish I catch and release it because I do not like killing animals.
Go-
I feel like I never stop. I am always busy. Go, Go, Go! Weather it be soccer, school, chores, or homework, it feels like I never stop.
Horses-
I enjoy horseback riding. I have recently just started riding, but I love every second I can be on a horse.
Ice-
I chew on ice more than anything, I annoy the stuffing out of people because of how much I chomp on it.
Jennifer-
My mom has been a great role model in my life. I do not know where I would be without her. Everything I know is because of her. I would have nothing if I did not have such a strong loving mom.
Konnor-
Konnor is my little brother. He is a hand full, but without him, my life would be so dull. He is almost like my own child. I treat him like I am his second mom. If he ever needs anything he always comes to me before our parents.
Love-
Without love in my life, my life would be meaningless. Love is my fuel. Without fuel you cannot go anywhere, without love I could not have become the person that I am today.
Mothers-
I have the great pleasure of having my mom and people that are like moms to me. Having my mom has shown me what I want ot be to my children and what I do not want to be. Having other women figures in my life has made me realize just how wonderful mothers can be.
Naked-
My favorite drink. I love the “Green Machine”. It looks so nasty, but it is so tasty, and it's probably the best mistake I made.
Ocean-
The ocean is a place I visit often. Weather it be sunny or rainy I will always go to the ocean.
Pigs-
I love pigs. When I was little I remember I wanted to be a pig and my whole vocabulary was something with the word pig in it.
Queen-
My boyfriend Tyler thinks he treats me like a princess, but really he treats me like his queen.
Race-
NASCAR has been a part of my life from the day I started watching TV. My dad had always love watching cars only turn left going in a circle for miles and miles. I myself love the Indy car racing.
Sports-
Sports have influenced my life since the day I could walk. I have been playing soccer since I was 3. I played softball from the ages of 4-15. And I played volleyball Freshman, Sophomore, and Junior years of high school.
Tyler-
Tyler has been a very understanding, caring, loving boyfriend. Everything I do he may not agree with, but he supports me on any choice I make. He is a very loyal, kind-hearted person that I am glad I can call mine
Understanding-
I am really understanding, and loyal. When people need to have someone listen to them, they tend to come to me for help, or advice.
Vegetarian-
I have been a vegetarian for a while now and it was probably the best idea I have had. It is hard at sometimes when my parents make dinner and it has meat in it, and I just take a small portion of it and pick out the meat.
Water-
Water is my favorite thing to consume on a daily basis. I love water.
Xoxo-
I love affection. It makes me happy.
Apples are one of my most favorite fruit. They are healthy and delicious.
Brothers-
I have two brothers. Konnor and Kristopher. Konnor is eight and Kristopher is Nineteen.
Caramel-
Caramel is my favorite food. I do not think it is really a food but it is mine.
Dog-
My puppy is my baby. He is a min pin mix. He is almost two years old and he will never get any bigger than a puppy.
Evangelical-
Church has a major part in my life. Without religion in my life to keep me sane, my life would be even more crazy and hectic.
Fishing-
Fishing and I go hand-in-hand. I love fishing. When I catch a fish I catch and release it because I do not like killing animals.
Go-
I feel like I never stop. I am always busy. Go, Go, Go! Weather it be soccer, school, chores, or homework, it feels like I never stop.
Horses-
I enjoy horseback riding. I have recently just started riding, but I love every second I can be on a horse.
Ice-
I chew on ice more than anything, I annoy the stuffing out of people because of how much I chomp on it.
Jennifer-
My mom has been a great role model in my life. I do not know where I would be without her. Everything I know is because of her. I would have nothing if I did not have such a strong loving mom.
Konnor-
Konnor is my little brother. He is a hand full, but without him, my life would be so dull. He is almost like my own child. I treat him like I am his second mom. If he ever needs anything he always comes to me before our parents.
Love-
Without love in my life, my life would be meaningless. Love is my fuel. Without fuel you cannot go anywhere, without love I could not have become the person that I am today.
Mothers-
I have the great pleasure of having my mom and people that are like moms to me. Having my mom has shown me what I want ot be to my children and what I do not want to be. Having other women figures in my life has made me realize just how wonderful mothers can be.
Naked-
My favorite drink. I love the “Green Machine”. It looks so nasty, but it is so tasty, and it's probably the best mistake I made.
Ocean-
The ocean is a place I visit often. Weather it be sunny or rainy I will always go to the ocean.
Pigs-
I love pigs. When I was little I remember I wanted to be a pig and my whole vocabulary was something with the word pig in it.
Queen-
My boyfriend Tyler thinks he treats me like a princess, but really he treats me like his queen.
Race-
NASCAR has been a part of my life from the day I started watching TV. My dad had always love watching cars only turn left going in a circle for miles and miles. I myself love the Indy car racing.
Sports-
Sports have influenced my life since the day I could walk. I have been playing soccer since I was 3. I played softball from the ages of 4-15. And I played volleyball Freshman, Sophomore, and Junior years of high school.
Tyler-
Tyler has been a very understanding, caring, loving boyfriend. Everything I do he may not agree with, but he supports me on any choice I make. He is a very loyal, kind-hearted person that I am glad I can call mine
Understanding-
I am really understanding, and loyal. When people need to have someone listen to them, they tend to come to me for help, or advice.
Vegetarian-
I have been a vegetarian for a while now and it was probably the best idea I have had. It is hard at sometimes when my parents make dinner and it has meat in it, and I just take a small portion of it and pick out the meat.
Water-
Water is my favorite thing to consume on a daily basis. I love water.
Xoxo-
I love affection. It makes me happy.